Friday, May 26, 2006

For Once Depression Sets In....

Well so I walked into this crazy relationship, knowing that things would never be normal and so it happens I have a awful week I chased people off my property with an unloaded gun-- simply cause they threatened me with a gun they had in their car. These people were uninvited to my property and were disrespecting me. Then I was so drunk off beer and shots of rum that I was sharing with my childhood friend whom we both finally reconciled after a falling out we had like 6 years ago. but I guess in my rage I yelled at my now ex-girlfriend... (which I don't remember.) 

 Not using alcohol as an excuse for what I did, but its a strong factor so not with this guilt riding my mind me and her had a fight like the second night we were together cause I was making some strong passes -- which lead me to sleeping on the couch and saying fuck you to my girlfriend... Yes I am retarded and I was also shit-faced-- then another night my roomates were fighting an it just triggered something in me so I punched the shit out my bedroom door... (I am retarded!) I haven't cared for someone like this in forever and my brain is driving me absolutely insane.... 

Then the day of my bands show (Ashes Of Another) she like avoids/ breaks up with me cause I guess I scare her... Oh and to add to it all the reason why im a broke piece of shit is cause my dad was hitting my mom for months then he decides to call her bitch/cunt/slut whatever so I knock the shit out of him- an lose my job.... what an awesome year-- oh an on top of that I lost my apartment.... FUCK 2006